A friend of mine recently called me completely beside herself. Since this friend is usually one of the most even tempered and calm people I knew, I immediately assumed the worst. It turned out that she was so upset and racked with worry because her college age son admitted that his new girlfriend worked as a stripper. Although my friend is a kind hearted soul who does not usually jump to judgment, she was very concerned about what this meant for her son and whether this new girlfriend would lead her son down a dark and depraved path. Together we worked out a strategy to deal with this unusual issue and she admitted that she felt much better after hashing it out with me. Here are some tips and suggestions on how to react if your find out your son is dating someone who makes her living working as a stripper.
Try To Let Go Of Your Preconceived Ideas. Those of us with little knowledge of this profession assume that all strippers work in seedy bars and don’t stop at just the dancing. The reality is that there are many upscale establishments that feature strippers as their main entertainment and are strictly monitored to prohibit any funny business. The United States is traditionally very uptight on the issue of nudity, while other countries embrace the beauty of a woman’s naked body and do not immediately judge a woman for her choice to take her clothes off for a living. Many young women who take the job of strippers not only have a healthy attitude about their bodies and do not feel exploited by doing the job, but also feel empowered by it and make a good living to boot. If you learn that your son is dating a stripper, do not immediately jump to judgment about this young lady, but try to look at the situation with an open mind.
Get To Know Her. Regardless of what your thoughts and opinions are of what your son’s new girlfriend does to make a living, she has found a place in your son’s heart. For this reason alone, you need to cast aside your negative feelings and give her a chance. Invite her over for dinner and make a concerted effort to see what your son sees in her. By immediately discounting her as a “fling” or someone who is not good enough for your son, you will do nothing but harm the relationship between you and your son. Like it or not, your son is an adult and can make his own decisions on who to date. You can either accept the person in your son’s life or refuse to make an effort to accept this person due to your own inability to look past the surface.
Trust Your Son. Keep in mind that your son was raised with your good values and judgment. If your son has decided to date someone who is a stripper, he may have chosen to overlook this caveat because of his strong feelings for this young woman or it may simply not bother him at all. Either way, your son will not completely turn his back on the good parenting you have given him all these years and change his lifestyle into one that you don’t recognize.
You may initially be appalled and disheartened to learn that your son is dating a stripper. Visions of a complete change in lifestyle and a lack of morality may enter your mind. Although you may not be able to let go of your disapproval, how you relate to your son and his new girlfriend can either be a great step forward in developing a closer and more mature relationship with your son or cause serious damage that is not easily repaired.